I was coaching a leader recently who found herself in one of those classic leadership conundrums: how do you give tough feedback to a very talented new hire without dousing their spark?

Here’s the situation:
She had a new team member—a rock star on paper—who joined the company ready to hit the ground sprinting. Within weeks, this hire was offering up her deep expertise, sharing her impressive contact list, and diving in to “help” her peers whenever she saw a problem. Sounds like a dream employee, right?

Except… it wasn’t landing that way.

Her manager and peers were starting to feel rubbed the wrong way. Some felt like she was “stepping on toes.” Others quietly resented that she kept running in to “rescue” situations they were fully capable of handling. What this new hire saw as helpful came across to others as overstepping.

The leader asked me: How do I give her feedback without killing her enthusiasm?

That’s when we talked about a powerful coaching distinction: intention versus impact.

The Coaching Distinction: Intention vs. Impact

When we coach leaders (and their teams), we remind them:

  • Intention is what you mean to do.
  • Impact is how it actually lands.

Here’s the tricky part: you can have the best intention in the world and still create a negative impact.

This new hire’s intention? To help the company win more business, to jump in as a team player, and to leverage her experience for the greater good.

The impact? Some teammates felt undermined. The manager worried she wasn’t listening enough before leaping.

How Leaders Can Coach on This

This is where great coaching happens.

Instead of framing feedback as “you’re overstepping,” the leader can create curiosity:

  • “I know your intention is to help the team win. Can I share how some of your actions are being perceived?”
  • “When you jump in quickly to solve problems, the impact is that others may feel like their abilities are being questioned.”
  • “How might you show your support while also empowering others to lead the solution?”
 

By separating intention (good!) from impact (problematic), you can protect a new hire’s enthusiasm while still helping them recalibrate their approach.

Why This Matters

If you’re a leader, here’s your takeaway:
When you’re giving feedback—especially to someone who’s eager and committed—start by acknowledging their intention. Then coach them on the impact.

It’s a powerful way to preserve engagement while fostering growth.

Because let’s be honest: no one wakes up thinking, “How can I annoy my manager and alienate my team today?”

Most of the time, they’re just trying to help.

Your Challenge This Week:

The next time you need to give feedback, ask yourself:

  • Do I understand this person’s intention?
  • How can I separate their intention from the impact so they feel safe to adjust their behaviour without losing their drive?

Coaching isn’t about shutting people down. It’s about helping them grow—while keeping their enthusiasm intact.